Sunday, July 23, 2006
Life and/or whatever else
Once again I find it hard to sleep. Many things go through my mind... I have begun to wonder what I should or shouldn't post on here. Crazy, simply because this is MY blog. I have made many friends who have or are going through this deployment stuff through my blog... (Hi hope you had a great weekend!) Sometimes I find it easier to deal with what is going on in my head if I write things down, or type it I guess. Sometimes just a bunch of rambling is all I do. I use this to keep Brad up to date with what is going on at home too. Sometimes to post pictures, as it is faster for him to see them on my blog than to download everything with their horrible internet I am so thankful for. This weekend The girls and I ran into Brooke, a girl from her preschool class this last year and her mom. She was amazed at how much Brooke has grown just since she saw her last in May. She had said she swore my Brooke had grown at least five inches. I don't think that is possible, but our girls are very tall, thanks to their dad. :) This got me to thinking about how much Brad has missed. He made a comment to me today that his baby wasn't a baby anymore and it made him so sad. Gracie turned two in February. When Brad comes home she will be 2 1/2 and Brooke will be very close to 5 if not 5 already. A year is a long time and a few months more seems like forever. He has missed every holiday all year long. He has missed seeing Grace learn to ride her bike, those first times she pedaled so slow until she was able to race with Brooke. I have it taped, but yet it just isn't the same as being there. Everytime Brad talks to the girls, he is amazed at Gracie's new big words she is saying and at how Brooke is getting so tall and more grown up. A year is too long. Sometimes I didn't know how we would ever make it to this point, and sometimes I wonder how we will make it another two months. I know all will be fine, it has to be. If anything this deployment has brought us closer, made us see what is really important in life. This deployment has shown us many things. Who really cares, who our true friends are, some of which was a great surprise, others not so good. We will never take our time together for granted. Everyone makes mistakes, and we hope to make ours right. Sometimes you just feel so lost on what to do, what you should say. In the end all that matters is that you tried to do the right thing. This is getting long and I am rambling. It is nearly 3am, so I should try to get some sleep before it is time to get up. Take care of you Bradley! Our time is about up! We love you tons!
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2 comments:
I know blogging helped me keep my sanity while Dan was in Iraq.
It also helped me to know other families felt the same things I felt. Sometimes you feel like others are handling things better than you, but then you realize they are feeling this mixture of emotions,too. You are okay to feel the way you do.
This can be a real thriller of a roller coaster ride.
The next two months will go so slow. But, it will end and then relief and joy will feel so good.
Prayers going your way.
I know that I am very thankful for the other women I have found through blogging, who are going through the same thing I am. It really has helped me to see that I'm not the only one who is feeling the way I am. A year is a very long time when you think about it. Before they leave it doesn't seem that a year is all that long. Years have passed and you wonder where they have went. They pass so fast. Then your loved one leaves and you wonder if it could possibly pass any slower? I'm really praying that the time goes by quickly for all of us until they come home. Then, if it wants to slow down, that would be just fine with me! :)
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